Tonight, I had my own version of a mini break down. I was feeling stressed and inadequate and overwhelmed with all that I thought that I should do.
Thankfully, It wasn’t in front of MyTBP because it wasn’t pretty. Let me explain…
At some point between early morning swimming lessons, homeschooling, and laundry, I sat down with my iPhone and pointer finger extended, ready to scroll through Facebook and Twitter to catch up on social media for the day.
I knew that my search would be short-lived because myTBP’s science show is only thirty minutes, actually twenty-two minutes when he impatiently zips through the commercials.
It’s times like this when I curse TiVo because I think I could get something done in those missing eight minutes or at least have just a bit more time to breathe slower.
During my phone break, I saw an article about the intense solar energy and zodiac intensities that have recently taken place. The author suggested that those of us “most sensitive people” have likely felt this intensity and might be experiencing more dramatic mood swings and emotions.
Well, this certainly explains a lot.
Since Halloween, we have been riding the highs and lows of an intensity roller coaster. Initially I blamed it on the holiday that I love and hate equally; however, I expected the temporary onslaught of sugar and artificial colors to have exited his system by now.
Luckily, we aren’t living with the long-lasting tantrums that were frequent through the fours and fives, but lately it’s more of a case of the “short fuse syndrome.”
A larger reaction to a challenging swimming lesson or a request to put away the silverware. Increased eye rolling and sighing to our state history lesson or the suggestions about word choice during a writing assignment.
As I write this, I’m fully aware that my mood and my tolerance impacts him. I’m fully aware that he’s watching as I’m supposed to model self-care and stress management.
I have to admit that I forgot he could hear me as I sighed out loud when he requested that we get out the zombie makeup to create another short movie.
At that very moment, that getting-ready-for-dinner-time-moment, I lost my grace and walked upstairs so he didn’t see me experience my own “short fuse moment.”
I’m not the first parent to feel overwhelmed and cry. I certainly won’t be the last.
What I do know is that I have to take my own advice. The advice that I give readers, other parents, and even my own son.
Give yourself a break.
Not just because it helps you… it helps those around you.