I don’t think that it’s sour grapes.
I mean really…I didn’t expect to win or even be recognized for that matter! I was thrilled when the great ladies at Bon Bon Break nominated me for the VOTY. They had selected my original piece about my son’s turbulent adoption. I said that it was an honor just to be nominated and I meant it; but then my blog earned recognition in a local parenting magazine and like a peacock, I felt my colorful feathers standing up a bit. It felt good. I liked seeing my blog’s name in a publication; it didn’t matter that it was in tiny writing and without any explanation, it was in there.
I am a blogging newbie. I have just over a year under my belt and much of the jargon is still lost on me. I don’t know the importance of Bloglovin or g+ and I still cross my fingers each time I add pictures to my posts. Often, I go back to the home page after I hit “publish” just to make sure it really “got” there. Yeah…I’m a newbie.
I was happy to be nominated, until the news of the VOTY (BlogHer Voice of the Year 2013) winners started flowing like wine on my twitter feed. At first, I didn’t even know what VOTY stood for and then I started piecing things together. Minutes later, I saw that those that were not selected had received a “Thanks but No Thanks” email so I checked my email. There was no “maybe next year” email and I looked again just to make sure. My stomach hurt and at that moment, I let myself get excited. I started wondering if I could get myself on a plane for the first time in a very long time. I wondered if we could afford for the family to go and I even thought about how we would need a dog sitter for the elderly terrier and the spry doodle. I then took a few breaths and realized that the committee probably didn’t have my email, my submission was from the ladies at Bonbon so they would get the email. Did they get one about my piece? They probably didn’t want to disappoint me or maybe it was sitting in their crowded inbox.
Another tweet came out and said that the winner information would go live any minute. “My name is not going to be there “is what I said out loud but I caught myself thinking about the dreadful Chicago heat in the summer. I get sun stroke when it hits 78 degrees.
I saw the announcement and I read the list…more than once. My name wasn’t there. I didn’t expect it to be, but for a few minutes I thought…why not? Why not me?! It left me with questions and mixed feelings. So I read some of the winners’ submissions and they were not what I expected.
They were SO much better than I expected. Each one that I read, was more amazing than the rest. Two of the pieces had me in tears and another used such colorful language that I could not only feel her feelings, but I could picture her family. I could see exactly why these amazing and talented writers won.
After I had brought myself back to reality, I read the announcement again and saw that there were 2600 pieces that the committee looked at and that 3% of them would be recognized. This painted a much clearer picture for this newbie blogger that momentarily wondered if she would have stage fright when she read her piece in front of all those people! 🙂
Today, I am reminding myself why I blog. Although I am humorous, I don’t have the potty mouth that is sometimes required for the “humor” blogger. I write, but I am not a published writer and I don’t have an agent. I blog because I am a parent of a child that belongs to a tribe that I didn’t always understand. I blog to share my information and to gain knowledge from others.
I love writing and have found great support from the blogosphere. Most likely, I will try for the “lottery prize” of VOTY next year. You never know when your numbers will be picked! 🙂