My son forgot his lunch today. While this doesn’t seem like a big news story, it is quite an inconvenience when your child has severe food allergies and gets upset when things change unexpectedly. Working part-time, I had the ability to leave work right away to handle this problem. I quickly visited the nearest McDonald’s and drove directly to my son’s school. I was cursing both the student driver and the out-of-state travelers that were slowing me down. When I arrived at school, my son was sitting and drawing in the office. He was fine. He stood up and smiled when he saw me and the smile grew when he saw the recognizable bag.
All of my previous stress and frustration melted away and I enjoyed this brief check in with him about his day and the morning spelling test. He was overly cautious (which he often is) and double-checked that all of the food and drink was dairy free. I reassured him that it was fine and told him to have a good afternoon. I walked away relieved that there wasn’t a meltdown about the change or hunger from having to wait longer than usual.
Honestly, I am a bit concerned that this Mama check in and McDonald’s delivery was TOO much fun. I am going to have to really watch to make sure that the lunch isn’t purposely left to have a repeat performance of today!
When I got home, I had a chance to look at my blog and re-read some of my recent posts. I realize now that they have been a bit on the negative side. This momentum of “poor me” is not why I started this blog and it isn’t helpful to readers or parents looking for answers. The truth of the matter is that when you are the parent of a 2e child, it is easy to get overwhelmed and stressed. Especially if you are a worrying, control-freak like me.
Is he gaining important social skills?
Is he learning to be more flexible?
Is he getting academics that are appropriate for his level?
Is he making (and keeping) friends?
Is he showing the funny, smart, and caring side of himself?
These are just a few of the many questions that I ask myself all the time. Because of this, I can get caught up in the challenges and have to remind myself to focus on the progress and strengths. I would say 80% of this week could be considered successful. This is a huge improvement…especially considering some of the previous weeks that we have had!
When I went back to pick up my son, I made a promise to myself to focus on the positives today. Yes, I could have complained about leaving work in a hurry and having to buy him lunch. Afterall, I had other plans for the afternoon. As I was thinking about this new attitude shift, my boy came down the hall smiling. “Nice to see you again so soon,” he said. I smiled and said…”Nice to see you too my son”
We all get caught up in the negative thoughts loop, so it’s nice to know we are not alone in this journey.
Wendi-
Thank you so much! I truly believe that you get more of what you focus on…I just need to remind myself of this sometimes 😉
I agree with Wendi – it is so easy to get caught up in those negative loops. Something that changed how I think was reading an article about living in the moment more. She had said most of the time, right now is good. And when she’s unhappy it is usually because of something in the past or the future. So I am actively working on trying to live in the moment more, because the same is true for me. Most of the time, the moment isn’t so bad.
Beth-
Your comment makes a lot of sense to me. I tend to get the most upset when I worry about behavior challenges continuing or escalating as he gets bigger. Obviously, I can’t predict the future and should try to stop. Thanks for the reminder! 🙂